Full Circle

By Heidi
December 2000

Disclaimers-These are not my characters and I am not making any money off of them.
Ratings Info-SJR, rape, drama, R rating

After viewing the scenes and victims from the serial rapistís file, Sam addressed the people gathered in the command center-John, George, Grace, Marcus, and Bailey

"We have to catch this guy now, before he strikes again" Sam said

"How do you propose us doing that?" John asked

"Well, we have to look at the victims and their backgrounds and see if anything clicks" Sam replied

"George do your thing" Bailey said as he left the command center.

After the meeting, Sam went to her office to study the victims. By lunchtime, she still had not made a connection between any of the victims.

John stuck his head into her office and asked Sam to lunch. She agreed because she needed a break from all of the violence that she had been concentrating on all morning.

Lunch was suprisingly fun. John kept her mind off of everything by telling her stories of his days with the Atlanta PD. That was short lived when both of their beepers went off. John pulled out his cell phone and dialed in.

"Grant. Ok, weíre on our way" He clicked the phone shut and turned to Sam.

"That was Bailey. We have another victim and she is worse than the other victims. She is at Atlanta County and we need to meet Bailey in the lobby ASAP."

Sam looked at him and said "Letís go"

When they got to the hospital , Bailey was waiting for them in the lobby.

"The victim is worse than anything we have seen up to this point from the guy" Bailey addressed to John and Sam.

"Letís go up and talk to her and see what we can get" Sam said

When they got to the door of the room, Bailey stopped Sam and said- "Sam, she is pretty bad and I want you to be prepared before you go in. The doctor said that she had been raped repeatedly over the course of several days. She is beaten up pretty badly"

"Ok" Sam said and entered the room of the latest victim

When she entered the room, Sam thought to herself that Bailey was wrong. This woman is even worse. The person in the bed stirred and noticed Sam by the door. Sam could clearly see the bruises, cuts, and general trauma that the woman had been through at the hands of the rapist. Sam introduced herself to the victim.

"Miss Courty, I am Dr. Samantha Waters from the FBI. I am here to talk to you about what happened. Do you remember anything about the man who attacked you?"

"It was dark and he was very tall because I remember hitting his chin when I turned around" Miss Courty told Sam

"Any other physical features about him that you can remember?" Sam asked

"I remember long hair because it was on my face while he was.......raping me" Miss Courty responded

Sam then asked about the rape directly.

"Thank you Miss Courty for your help" Sam said as she walked out of the door. John and Bailey were waiting for her in the hall.

"Well, I found out some details about the rapist. He is tall with long hair. Letís see if our other victims can compare to this description. The rapist is using toys and having fun with the victims before he letí s them go. Miss Courty said that he has handcuffs, rope, and speaks to the victims and admonishes them" Sam told the two men

They all returned to the command center.

John stuck his head into Samís office "I was wondering if you wanted to grab some dinner now because it looks like a long night"

"Sure, John. Let me grab my stuff" Sam said

Sam and John turned to the same restaurant where they had lunch together earlier. Sam was strangely quiet, so John being himself asked her what was wrong

"It is these victims. All different races, all different professions, and no ties to each other. I canít really get a good read on this guy" Sam replied to his question

"Maybe you just need some time and a little rest" John said as Sam stifled a yawn.

"Maybe you are right" Sam said

Dinner was paid for and they returned to the office. Sam headed for her office to get a quick nap and John headed to his desk to keep checking the files for a clue they could have missed.

Sam woke up with a start and realized that she knew what the connections were between victims.

Everyone was assembled in the command center and waiting for Sam to present her theory.

"The factors seem to be forming a pattern. The rapist has a pattern of hair color, race, place, and time. He first raped a brunette followed by a redhead and lastly a blond. We know that Cheryl Courty had red hair, so his next victim will have blond hair. Cheryl Courty is also Latino, so backtracking-the pattern goes like this-white, black, Latino. The next victim will also be white. The place and time part of the patterns work like this-Cheryl Courty was kidnapped from the mall that 6 of the other victims were taken from at 10pm on Saturday nights. The other 6 victims were kidnapped from the post office at around the same time from the same post office. The other 6 victims were taken from their homes. His next victim will be taken from the post office" Sam finished

"So this guy is going to be on the hunt for a blond, white woman in the post office on Saturday night at 10 p.m." John asked

Sam asked to see Bailey in her office now. From where they were, the team could see Bailey and Sam having an animated conversation. After a few minutes, they both walked back into the command center.

Bailey addressed the group "Sam thinks that we can catch this guy by using and undercover agent posing as the next victim and she wants to do it"

"Are you crazy?" yelled John "this could be really dangerous"

"I know, but we need to catch this guy" Sam replied

"She wonít be in the dark out there. She will be wired and have a skin beeper implanted. We will have other agents as decoys around and John, you will be monitoring her from the van" Bailey said

"This meeting is over, so go and get ready. We meet back here in 2 hours" Bailey told his group

Sam was in Graceís lab getting all wired up when John walked in.

"Ok, Sam. You are all wired up" Grace said as she left the lab

"You are crazy. You could get hurt on this assignment" John said concern lacing his voice

"I know, but this guy needs to be stopped now and you will be monitoring me, so nothing bad will happen." Sam smiled at John

"Ok, people. Letís go" Bailey yelled from the hall.

Sam walked into the post office and scanned the area. She saw several people milling around, but none that fit the description of the serial rapist. She could hear, through her earpiece, John and George talking.

"Ok, Sam. Let us know when you see this guy and weíll grab him" John said to her

"I will. Nobody yet" Sam replied to him

This continued for several hours. The team was ready to give up and pack it in when Sam came over the wire.

"Ok. There is someone here who matches the description of the serial rapist perfectly. I am going to get closer." Sam calmly stated to her listeners.

"Sam, just let us get this guy" John, Bailey, and Marcus all replied simultaneously

Just then, George reported that Sam was off the screen.

"What the hell do you mean?" shouted 3 angry male voices

"She just disappeared" George replied "Bailey, the rapist could have grabbed her before she knew what was happening"

"Everyone move in now!" an angry Bailey shouted running in

About 50 agents moved in and surrounded the post office

"Bailey, over here" shouted Marcus

"What?" replied Bailey and saw Samís wire and bag laying on the floor

"He knew she was wired and thatís a major problem" Marcus said

John came into the post office and said that there were no witnesses that saw anything

"George, any luck on that skin beeper thing?" Marcus asked

"Not yet, but it will come up soon" George said concentrating on his computer screen

"Not soon enough" John said "she could be the next victim if we donít find her soon"

No one wanted to think about Sam being the rapistís next victim, but all of the men were thinking it.

"Keep at it George. We need to find her now. Everyone back to the command center. We can plan our next moves from there." Bailey instructed the team

While everyone was en route back to the VCTF, Sam was just realizing where she was and what had happened. The rapist knew she was wired and when she got close to him, he grabbed the wire off of her. He then hit her on the head and sent her spiraling into darkness. Sam felt the handcuffs on her wrists tighten with each move. She hoped that the VCTF could get her before she became a victim.

Samís attacker strolled into the room and saw that she was awake. He smiled with a creepy grin.

"Dr. Waters, so good of you to join the land of the living" Lou Handelman replied

"I never pictured you as a rapist, Detective Handelman" Sam questioned

"I guess you wouldnít, but it was all so easy. Wear a disguise and flash a badge, thatís all it took to get close to these women. I didnít expect you to be my next victim" Lou replied

"The VCTF knows where I am and is going to be here because they are tracking me" Sam said trying to keep her voice calm and level

"I donít think so, Dr. Waters. You see, I know all about the skin beeper and I have managed to disable it for now. No one knows where you are" Lou replied with a smirk in his voice "Malone will only get you back when I am finished with you and after that, no one will want you. Not even John Grant"

"What do you mean?" Sam asked already knowing the answer

"You wanted to play undercover agent and pose as the next victim. So now, you get to be the next victim" Lou told her

Meanwhile, back at the VCTF offices..............................

"George, any word on the tracking device?" John asked looking worried

"Not yet" George replied tapping computer keys "but I found something interesting at the post office. With all of the cars in the lot, why was Lou Handelmanís there? He wasnít on the Atlanta PD team and had no reason to be there unless....."

"Unless what?" John asked

"Unless he is the rapist and now has Sam" George stated

John knew that it made sense, but Lou was a friend and trusted colleague.

"Try to see if Handelman has any connections to the victims. We know his connection to Sam is through me and the VCTF" John stated with no emotion.

George tapped a few computer keys and turned to John, Marcus, and Bailey with his findings.

"Ok, we have several connections to Handelman through all of the victims. They all had some kind of case with the Atlanta PD. We know that Jackís kidnapping and murder attempt is one of the dealings that Sam had with Handelman. We know that he dislikes Sam because of the case and the VCTF and John. We need to find her now." George told the 4 large, angry men at the table

"With Handelman going off the deep end, Sam is very likely to be the next victim in his spree" Bailey finished

Sam realized that Handelman was right. If the skin beeper was working, the team would have been here hours age. She knew that he intended to rape her and give her back to the VCTF when he was finished. Sam remembered all of the other victims and how they looked after the attack. Sam knew that the VCTF was doing their damnedest to find her, but she knew that they wouldnít find her before Handelman raped her.

"Dr. Waters" Lou said coming into the room and getting her attention "Good. You are awake. I wanted to get started now. Youíd better follow my instructions or the only way you will see your daughterís lovely smile is from a prison cell" he coldly told her

"Ok, I will do anything" Sam said feeling desperate to hold onto something

Handelman looked at Sam and told her point blank "I am going to uncuff you now, but remember I control everything"

As Handelman uncuffed her, Sam tried to make a run for it and was stopped with a slap to her face.

"Dr. Waters, you have a severe listening problem that needs to be corrected" Handelman told her

Sam found herself laying on her back with her hands cuffed above her head. Handelman began tearing her clothes off and remarked "Dr. Waters, I would have never pictured you with a black lace teddy under those severe suits."

Handelman stripped her naked and remarked that he was going to sample her wares before John Grant.

"Johnny doesnít know what heís been missing"

"Go to hell" Sam said and earned the chance to be a human punching bag.

Sam felt blood from her nose and split lip on her chin. She knew that she had 2 black eyes and a variety of bruises on her body already. Handelman was hitting her every place and then some. Handelman climbed on top of her and began to commit the rape. Sam felt the tears welling up inside of her and decided that she wouldnít cry and give Lou the satisfaction of seeing her cry. Handelman climbed off of her and punched her again for 45 minutes.

ĎWell, youíre done. I am going to get cleaned up and maybe let the VCTF know where they can pick you up at.

Back at the VCTF........................

George was trying desperately to get a lock on Sam while being watched by 3 angry and worried men

"Come on George, make it work" John pleaded because Sam had been missing for 6 hours

"Ok, I have her on screen and have a lock on her position" George told the group

"Letís go get her and bring her home" Bailey replied as he got up and headed for the door

On the drive to the location, Bailey lectured the people in the van.

"She has probably been raped by Handelman and we need to get her help right away. You guys know the deal with rape victims, but sheís one of us" Bailey replied and looked at the somber faces around him

He knew that John would take it hard because he was in love with Sam and they were on the way to a relationship.

"John, you are the second in because you are to help Sam" Bailey said and watched Johnís face

"Ok. Not a problem" John responded and looked out the window

They got to the location and were set to go in. Bailey and Marcus went in first closely followed by John.

John rushed over to the bed where a naked, raped, and handcuffed woman lay. Sam looked at him, but her blue eyes held no sparkle. John took off his coat and covered her up while he undid the handcuffs. Sam gave him a big, tight hug. She managed to slip into his jacket without too much more exposure. Someone from the Atlanta PD handed her a blanket to cover up with. Bailey, John, and Marcus looked at her and she looked back at them.

"It was Lou Handelman" Sam told the onlookers in a small, saddened voice.

"We know Sam. We figured it out and he is already in VCTF custody" Bailey told her

"We need to get you to a hospital" Bailey stated to her

"Iím fine" Sam told him flatly

"No you arenít. You are a victim and need medical care" Bailey told her without a challenge

"Iím not going to the hospital" Sam told him back

"Fine, if you arenít going to the hospital, come back to the VCTF and let Grace check you out" Bailey told her and Sam agreed to it.

Sam was helped out to the van by John and he held her hand all of the way back to the VCTF. Grace met Sam at the door and gave her a hug.

"Ok, letís get you checked out. I know you were a victim and there are tests that need to be run" Grace began leading Sam to the lab when Bailey stopped them

Bailey cleared his throat and told them that for everyoneís sake and to ensure that no mistakes were made, that someone else had to be present for the exam.

"Who has to be present, Bailey?" Sam asked in a low voice

"It has to be a cop" Bailey replied and all heads turned to John.

"I have done this before and it wonít be a problem" John told the group.

"Ok" Sam said and allowed Grace to lead her into the lab

Sam wasnít real happy that another man had to be there to witness all of her pain. John told her that it was a routine procedure and that it was ok. Sam wasnít so sure about that one.

"Ok, Sam. You can sit up now. You are physically ok, aside from the bruises and black eyes. You need to take the morning after pill, just in case. We already know the results of the HIV test." Grace told her and left the lab.

"Sam. You know what I need" John told her in a soft voice

"Here it is" Sam said and preceded to tell him the entire story of the rape.

John walked out of the lab an hour later, definitely more pale and shocked than before. Sam walked into the command center and 4 faces looked at her.

"Sam, what are you doing here? Go home and get some rest" Bailey told her

"This is my case. I was a victim, let me help" Sam clearly told him trying to keep the tears at bay.

"You canít help for that reason" John told her softly

Sam left the command center and went to her office. She sat there thinking about the rape. Although no one had mentioned it to her, they were all concerned, especially John. She had watched his face during the exam and knew that he was uncomfortable with seeing a co-worker like that. Sam had wanted to explore a relationship with him and had considered making a move when this case had come up. She now feared that it would never happen.

Sam sat in her firehouse prison just thinking about how much she had been through in the last few days. From trailing a suspect who had victimized so many women to being one of those women. Sam had lived through the humiliating rape exam in front of her friends, Grace and John. Grace was so supportive during everything and John had just dealt with it. He was present for the exam and then listened to her go over every detail of the rape, so that a solid case could be built. Everyone had called and some had stopped by to make sure that she was ok. The hardest thing, though, was telling Angel. Angel had been her best friend since childhood. Angel just listened and comforted Sam. She didnít make any comments, but was just there. She listened to Sam vent and yell and even cry. Sam made the decision not to tell Chloe what happened because she was so young and didnít want her daughter to know what had taken place.

The next day, Sam was jostled by the person who sat down next to her at the arraignment for Lou Handelman. She was surprised when she looked at the person next to her, it was John.

"I didnít expect to see you here" Sam directed to John.

"I had to be here. He is, uh, was a friend. I also had to be here for you. I know it is hard for a victim to see their attacker. I figured you could use some support" John told her as he tried to hold her hand

John was surprised when Sam pulled back at his touch. John knew what had happened. It was typical of rape victims to not want to be touched, especially by males. It was a fear thing.

Sam was so shocked that she pulled back from John, her friend and so much more. He had been her rock and support for a long time. She just did it automatically without thinking. John was first to break the silence that enveloped them.

"Sam, I am so sorry. I just didnít think" John told her

"I know that it was a friendship gesture. It is just that...." Sam trailed off

"I know and it is ok" John told her and then directed his attention back to the courtroom.

Lou Handelman walked into the courtroom with his lawyer and looked directly at Sam and John. He smiled at them in a devious way. Sam got a cold chill from his look. Sam looked at John and could see the tension in him building up. The Handelman arraignment went smoothly and the judge denied the bail request. Handelman was then returned to his cell at the VCTF headquarters. He was being kept in the same cell as Austin Keller had been.

After agonizing for hours, Sam decided to see the man that had raped and victimized her in more than one way. She told no one where or what she was doing, but she knew that they would find out eventually and yell at her. She had to do this for herself.

When Sam finally sat down to speak to Handelman, there were a million and one questions that she wanted to ask him.

"Dr. Waters, how lovely of you to come see me" Lou politely said to her with a smile

"I have some questions that I want answers to" Sam told him in her FBI mode

"Please ask away doctor" Handelman still polite told her

"Why me? You knew who I was at the post office. You had to know that I would figure it out and bust you. Why risk it?" Sam asked him

"It was getting back at Malone. He took Johnny away from the job and turned him into an FBI idiot. Malone turned him away from his true friends and family. You were there and accessible. I figured that everyone would be too busy dealing with their star and helping her to get better" Lou told her in a matter of fact way

Sam was ready to leave when Handelman spoke to her and chilled her to the bone.

"So how was the rape evidence exam? Did poor little Johnny see the woman he is in love with in the most exposed way? Did he cuddle up to you and comfort you in your time of need?" Handelman yelled at her as Sam walked out the door.

Sam knew that John and Bailey and the rest of the team would see and hear the conversation. She wondered how Bailey would feel knowing that Handelman raped her out of revenge against Bailey. He would have a tough time dealing with that. Sam also wondered about John. Lou Handelman had been his friend and mentor. John would definitely take it hard and personal. Sam had a suspicion that guilt would be rampant once the tape was shown. She didnít want anyone to feel guilty. She knew what she was getting herself into when she brought up the idea of going undercover.

Sam got in her car and pounded on the steering wheel. She had gotten nowhere with Handelman. Yes, he gave her some answers, but they were not the ones she wanted to hear. Sam never figured that Handelman would go after her for revenge against Bailey and John. She was confused about Lou telling her that John loved her. As far as she was concerned, John was a close friend. Sam had feelings for him, but had done nothing about them. Did John feel the same way about her? Sam found herself at odds while she drove out of the parking lot and home to the firehouse prison.

Bailey called John into his office.

"There is something that you need to know" Bailey told John as he popped a tape into the VCR.

The tape replayed Samís visit and conversation with Lou Handelman. Bailey had a blank look on his face. John was completely shattered by what his former friend had to say.

"How is Sam doing? She had to be upset by the things that Handelman had to say" John asked Bailey

"Sam requested some vacation time. She was very quiet and didnít have too much to say" Bailey told him.

John left Baileyís office and returned to his desk. He couldnít believe what Lou told his closest friend. Yeah, he had lost contact with some of his friends from the Atlanta PD, but he didnít think that he had really changed all that much.

Bailey also ensconced himself in his office away from the world. He felt so guilty for what had happened to Sam. He rationally knew that it wasnít his fault, but he was the one that went along with Samís original plan. Bailey was also worried about John and how he was dealing with things.

The team gathered in the command center, less one person, because they still had open cases and a routine to follow. Their hearts werenít in anything they did that morning.

"Bailey" George said turning to the older man "Sam isnít looking all that great. Check out this video from this morning at the firehouse"

The team all watched quietly as the tape showed Sam roaming from room to room with a blank, lost expression on her face.

"She really has a lot to deal with and I am glad that Angel and Chloe arenít there to see her like this" Grace commented

"I think that we should do something for her. Sam needs to get her mind off of what happened" John said

"What will cheer her up" Marcus asked John

"I am going to go over there after work and take her ice skating" John told the team

"You know she canít skate" Grace chided John

"I know that she canít skate, but thatís the point. She will be so busy trying to stay up and concentrating on that instead of the rape" John said to Grace smiling

Later that evening, Sam was shocked to see John standing at her front door.

"What are you doing her?" Sam asked questioning him with her eyes

"Go get dressed. You and I have plans tonight" John told her moving past Sam and into the firehouse.

"Where are you taking me?" Sam asked

"It is a surprise" John said as he sat down on her sofa.

When they got to the ice rink, Sam turned toward John and was the first one to speak.

"What are we doing here? You know I canít skate" Sam said getting out of Johnís sports car

"We are here to have fun, so no complaining tonight" John told her walking toward the doors of the rink

Before Sam knew it, she was having fun with John, except when he laughed at her when she fell.

John had never seen her smile so much after the rape. He knew that she wasnít dwelling on it because she was putting so much energy and concentration into staying upright.

The next thing that they knew, the lights began to flicker because the ice rink was closing. John guided Sam off of the ice. As they walked to the parking lot, Sam turned and faced John.

"This was fun. I didnít even think about the rape once when I was with you" Sam told the man in front of her.

"Do you want to talk about what happened? You havenít talked about it to anyone" John asked Sam opening the car door for her

"How do you know that?" Sam asked him incredulous that he would know something like that

"I have my ways" John said starting the car.

John drove to a secluded spot known as "Loverís Lane". He turned off the car and turned toward Sam.

"Loverís Lane, huh? Is that a clue-do you know this spot well?" Sam asked John

"Not that well, but it is a private place without guards and cameras" John told her

"I appreciate you considering my feelings after everything that has happened" Sam smiled at him before she continued.

"I never imagined that it would happen to me. I am an FBI agent. I figured I would be safe or at least able to fight off an attacker, I guess I was wrong. The only big threat in my life has been Jack. I knew that when Handelman told me about the skin beeper, I was going to be raped. The worst part of it was him hitting me over and over again. It seemed to last forever and I was always in pain. There has never been another man in my life in that way since Tom, so things hurt alot when he raped me. I went to see him in jail and he said some things about you and Bailey." Sam finished with tears on her face.

"Bailey and I have seen the tape. We know what Handelman said" John told her softly.

"I donít understand Handelman throwing you into the mix" Sam said expecting an answer from him.

"Lou knew that I liked you more than just being friends. He thought the rape and seeing you victimized would throw me enough not to pursue a relationship. It hasnít and wonít. I love you Sam and I am willing to wait until you are ready" John told her hoping for an answer he wanted to hear from her.

"I wanted to tell you how much I loved you and then this case came up before I had the chance. I am going to need time before we go any farther than kisses and hugs. I hope you understand" Sam replied to Johnís bold declaration of love.

"I do understand and am willing to wait" John said dropping a kiss on her lips.

Sam returned that kiss and began to look forward to what might be some day. Sam and John held hands all the way back to the firehouse.

The End

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